Calm Yourself Instantly Anywhere

Everybody has been anxious at some time and it doesn’t matter how relaxed you are before you are going to present a speech or before facing an exam or an interview? We have all felt the effects of anxiety at some stage of our lives, we all know too well the shivers that assail us or the trembling and the sweats that we get before we have to face something that makes us shake inside.

The object of this article is to give you differing ideas on how to liberate yourself from these same feelings and to combat this affliction that many of us have trouble with from time to time. It will give you good insight into the different ways in which you can control this, and that you can utilize anywhere without embarrassing yourself. You will not be told to meditate on the floor or eat a apple or anything like that, and you will not be asked to chant anything at all. So please read on…

In looking at calming yourself down, which is really a wrong terminology, we actually calm up.

To calm yourself you really need to integrate yourself with your surrounding and move mentally inwards to obtain a steadying affect, so please don’t try to disconnect yourself from your environment, you need to embrace it.

The Chair Press-up

This is very handy if you are waiting to deliver a speech or if you’re slightly nervous in a group environment. Simply locate your hands on the edge of your chair. Maybe there are no arms? Then simply place them on the seat. Make sure you brace yourself, now, inhale deeply and push upwards with your hands and feet as you exhale. Lock your arms at this phase and allow your torso to hang by your arms for just a moment as you finish exhaling…. drawn-out and deeply. Then go limp, but stay in the locked up position. Then simply sit back, you will feel limp as a noodle and everything is great.

The Way You Breath

This is a crucial part of calming yourself, and the recommendation here is to look into the Eastern styles of breathing techniques with the use of the diaphragm; this is a powerful muscle and should be used more. You should breathe in easily and powerfully through your nose and expand your diaphragm. You should be breathing into your stomach here and not your chest. Then, blow it out powerfully and steadily through your mouth. Do this a few times. You will be able to feel the tenseness departing your body as you do this.

Spreading Your Legs

This may not seem like an important one but it does have quite sincere subconscious worth. When we are relaxed (and particularly men) we tend to spread our legs and take up much more room. By allowing yourself to spread your legs and either sitting or standing you will occupy more space, and this is what we do when we are comfortable in a particular environment. Try and allow the state of comfort to follow on from this.

Try Slouching Slightly

We all know that slouching is bad for posture and this activity won’t affect you as you will only be doing it for a short time. People do tend to slouch more when they are at ease and relaxed and this is something you can try next time you are up tight. Just by allowing yourself to slouch slightly your muscles will tend to release and this will give you some relief from the tensed feeling that you have. The feeling will follow the action as you allow your head to recline and you let yourself slouch into the chair.

Your Power Hands

When you observe powerful people you will usually notice that they are calm people, often relaxed and very comfortable in what they do, you will also learn that they do a couple of things with their hands, either the hands behind the head or stippling their hands. To make a steeple simply place your elbows on a table and spire your hands before your face, similar to the bad guy in the movies that is thinking and plotting. Place yourself in his position and realize that you are going to come out on top and that you are in control as you plan and devise in your head. Just think of the actions that you are putting into place and that everything is going to work out fine. Maybe you are in the corporate world and need a slightly different look, so you recline back in your chair and place your hands behind your head, and intertwine your fingers. This is the posture that the boss will most likely take when they talk to their workers, this alone will make you feel very relaxed and on top of things.


This is a very compelling psychological tool to utilize and can have great benefit towards the lessening of anxiety. Certain actions and stimuli all have an anchoring effect on our minds and these can trigger certain responses and feelings. These same anchoring effects are to be used everywhere and are the main reason behind many of the potent psychological triggers and anchors that are used in everyday life. Perhaps you might be at a wedding and a certain song will be playing, maybe hearing this same song at a later date will make you start crying and this affection event was the wedding and the song was the anchor to this wonderful occasion and this triggered your emotions. And when you hear the song again you think of the time you heard it before and thus your emotions are triggered.

Or, say you become ill from eating or drinking something and the moment you smell this again you start to feel ill again, the emotional event behind this is getting sick and the anchor is the drink or food itself. Hence smelling this is what made you sick in the first place and is what could make you very sick once again. So we have anchors everywhere in life and are in both positive and negative emotions and to control these you have to calm yourself, and develop a specified anchor to relate to being calm. And every time you use this you must reinforce the anchor. The anchor I use is my palm down on my thigh and every time I calm myself for whatever reason I place my hand on my thigh once again to reinforce the anchor. So therefore each time I need to be calm I place my hand on my thigh and then I release the trigger and then calm down; this is simply recreating the feeling that is tied to the anchor, which in case is relaxation. So, do this whenever you are relaxed and when you do necessitate becoming relaxed and this will help to place you in that same mental state.

What to Do With Internal Dialogue

To control the internal dialogue you really do need to kill it, and there is one good way to achieve this. (No – it’s not think about beautiful things – although might help!).

If you find that you are talking yourself into a worrisome attribute, maybe while someone is talking you may be worried about something, start to do this straight away. Un-focus your eyes, and allow your peripheral vision to open up. Look directly at two regions ahead of you and slightly to each side. Maintain your conscious thoughts into this area and then draw your gaze from both points and allow them to meet at 45 degree angles as they meet in the higher area of your vision. And then bring your stare down and allow it to be directly in the front of your vision (maybe somebody’s face if they are talking). Now focus your gaze and imagine it coming straight back to yourself and come back with your consciousness to your own mind. This will increase the focus and will also allow you to perform this simple exercise at any time and will deflect the inner dialogue that plagues you.

Centering Yourself

At times you may feel an anxiety across your whole body and you may be particularly self conscious about an area of your body i.e., hands feet etc, and this exercise is particularly great for distracting these obtrusive thoughts. So, to begin with, close your eyes and inhale deeply a few times, and make them come in through the nose and out your mouth. Put your tongue directly against the back of your upper teeth and on your front pallet, this will induce cross lobe integration and further relax you and your brain. Visualize a point that is far ahead of you and transmit your thoughts there, allow yourself to become fully relaxed and continue to breath, allow your thoughts to stay there and you will soon forget all those obtrusive thoughts that only a little while ago had you in fits of worrisome anxiety. And when you are relaxed begin to slowly and carefully to bring the point of your focus in front of you nearer and allow yourself to return to that fully aware state.


  1. Amazing information.

    Thank you.

  2. im a diver for the Mile High Dive Club, and i started about five months ago. i go to the dry gym with trampolines and foam pits, and the pool at Utah Pool. my coach understands everything, considering that she was a former diver, so she understands when im scared. i always have to try new things at the pool, and most of them scare the bejeezus out of me. last week she told me that next practice i would have to a a 1 1/2 flip, or a reverse, and those scare me the most. i am going to do them, but i need a way to really calm myself down before i am about to do the dive. thank you

  3. Really, REALLY good ideas. I’ve searched for ways to calm oneself many times before, but nothing has worked like these exercises. Thanks so much!

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